"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
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