i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
