Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize