My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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