My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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