sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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