great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
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