You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
Randomize