That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
