I don't usually arrange sex via text message
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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