Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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