yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
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