Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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