She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize
