On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize