remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I think your dad took our porno
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
