Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
