I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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