I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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