I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
