i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Randomize