Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize