508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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