Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
I cut my penus on the lid.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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