rhymes with "ouble enetration"
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I'm determined to sit on that face.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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