i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
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Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
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Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
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