So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Randomize
