All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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