some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize