I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I am midnight drunk by noon
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
