Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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