Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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