actually, I'm a sock model
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
