Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
