Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize