Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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