hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
I know her cup size but not her name....
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