Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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