Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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