Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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