I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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