puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize