I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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