k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
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