How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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