Fuck appropriateness.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Randomize