Don't you send me to vm
I met the friendliest cop last night
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
