What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
