The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize
