I skipped work to stalk him.
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
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