you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Found the puke drawer
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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