that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
They are going to name an STD after you.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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